Do you need help with your debt load?

Are you in over your head? Are you scared? Overwhelmed? Well ya can’t unscramble eggs, so lets get to work.  First, the past is the past.  You cannot go back, not even one second.  That part of your life is done.  Sounds simple enough, but how many people do you know that do not move forward because they are so busy looking back?   Going forward is the first step in changing yourself.  No matter what you WANT to believe, this mess is no one's fault but your own.  It is not your parents, your kids, your relatives, your friends....Over the next several weeks, I will be blogging on setting up a budget, working with what you have (or don't have) and how to work at being happy the WHOLE time you are doing this.  You will start to feel better.  You will start to feel more empowered because you are doing something.

Take a deep breath.......and lets go.

My Journey into Debt

To begin, I have to give a bit of history of my past and current financial situation. I share this information not because I want people to be a voyeur into my private life, but maybe someone else out "there" has gone through, is going through or will go through similar situations.  Notice I also didn't say "our" Journey into debt.  Yes there was another person riding along with me, but I also had a voice.  I could have said no to purchases, no to trips/vacations, and all of the other non-essentials that were purchased.  I take full ownership of my part in this mess.

My birth began in a very poor family in Maine. The seventh child born out of ten. At the age of five, was placed in foster care where I remained until my high school graduation. The day after graduating, hopped onto a greyhound bus and headed for “the big city” of Boston! All of that is another story I will tell later, but it at least gives you my beginning.

My first job in a suburb of Boston was as a live in Nanny. That lasted 3 months before I couldn’t take it anymore and got a “real” job as a receptionist. My initial salary was $12,000 a year and can I tell you, I thought I was living the good life. I had my own apartment. I was even able to buy my first car (who needs food when you’re still in your teens?); and had hip clothes on my back.

Being 18 and growing up in the poorest regions of Maine, I never had money before. So I started reading books on setting up a budget. My first budget was very crude but worked for me at the time. Even on $12K a year I was meeting my bills and had a little extra to spare for the night life.

The older I got the more credit cards I got and slowly, I started paying for groceries, gas, clothes soon everything via credit cards. I now needed my spare change money to pay the credit card bills. The journey to my debt began when I started using plastic instead of green!

ARE CREDIT CARDS BAD?

This to me is a big no. In today’s society, we need to establish a good credit ranking before we can do anything. It is the excess wanting that makes the credit cards bad. In trying to keep up with the Jones we spend more than we need. Here I am today at 41 realizing that there really is not much that I need anymore except to being debt free.

By the time I got married at 28 I had put myself on another strict budget and was almost credit card debt free. My soon to be husband had 23 credit cards in his name. BEFORE we got married I sat down with him and asked if I could “control” the finances, by putting HIM on a budget also and giving him a weekly “allowance’. This was not an easy conversation and it took many future ones to convince him that this was the way to live our lives. The way I finally convinced him was to say “give me three months” and see what happens.

After being on a budget for three months, I was able to give him money (cash) to spend….boyfriend happy…..and 4 credit cards were paid off…..girlfriend happy. We saved and scrimped and paid $14,000 on our wedding from our own pockets. ONLY BECAUSE WE WERE ON A BUDGET! This was the SMARTEST time of our live.

Our arrogance grew, as did our paychecks. We decided we didn’t need budgets anymore. It took a few years but once again our debt began to climb. This time though it wasn’t small change. We were in debt for thousands of dollars.

COMING NEXT:   Setting up a budget and why they are important even when you are good with your money.